Horses love a leader, not a bully, but someone who inspires trust and confidence in them - Kelly Marks.
Hitting and shouting at your horse will only cause her fear. This is the way to make a horse behave badly! Then the horse gets the blame of being "a bad horse" and in reality it is YOU making your horse behave badly.
Never shout at your horse or get angry. Take a minute to breath deep into your stomach and breath out slowly and deep. Don't breathe into your chest but deep into your stomach and let your horse hear your breath coming out. The chances are, your horse will also do the same. You will hear her copy you. (like a sigh of relief)
Try it a few times when you are near to your horse and I've no doubt you will hear your horse do the same. It calms you down and slows down your heart rate. When you get nervous and start hitting, shouting or get angry, your heart rate raises and so does your horse. Do the breathing excise and you will see and feel the difference.
Don't forget horses will mirror your pulse rate and your emotions, even when you are feeling down on that day, they pick your feelings up. That's why they say,"Take a deep breath and count to ten". It truly works and once you start to use this breathing excise daily your body will automatically do the breathing excise when you start feeling anxious.
When your horse behaves badly, ask yourself, why?. What have I done to make him behave this way? Take a look at what you are doing around him, or how you are asking him to preform a task! The horse will do what is asked of her and if the teacher is showing the horse in a wrong way, then the horse can only act in the wrong way. Have someone there with you when things are not working out between you. Ask a proffessional horse trainer to come out for an hour or two to watch how you handle your horse. It could change the whole relationship between you and your horse. It will be money will spent and stays with both of you for a life time.
Did you know that poor and shallow breathing leads to distress physically and affects your mental alertness.
BREATHING EXCISE:
You could start doing this breathing excise once a day. It only takes a few minutes to do.
Lie down with a pillow under your head comfortably, bend your knees and keep your back flat.
When you feel comfortable start with the excise.
Put one hand on your chest and one on your stomach.
Inhale and relax your stomach muscles and count slowly to 5.
You will feel your stomach expand with air. Hold your breath for a few seconds.
Then exhale very slowly and let go of all the tension and relax your chest and face.
Do this a couple of times more and you will start to feel very relaxed.
This excise will remove all anxiety from your body. When you start to feel nervous or any anxiety when next to your horse, just try the breathing deep into your stomach, hold for a couple of seconds and release slowly letting your horse hear your breath out and listen for your horse to do the same!
Carry on with this breathing excise every day for about a week. Let me know when you have tried this excise and how it made you feel afterwards.